Wednesday, April 22, 2015

Pillow Talk

Back in my middle school days, I had a friend who was obsessed with all things cheetah. What was impressive to my 13 year old self was that this friend could identify the difference between all the spotted cats and with snobbish disdain declare, "That's not a cheetah print, that's leopard."



Even now, in the age of Google and Go Diego Go!, I'm too lazy to care.

But I do love a good animal print, be it cheetah, leopard, tiger, or my latest weakness, a fawn print. A bad animal print would be the cow costume I wore for Halloween in sixth grade.

Its unfortunate that I don't have an actual picture of me in the costume. Use your imagination.
 For a long time I've wanted some leopard print pillows like the ones all the cool kids on the internet have, and I've really wanted a velvet fabric. I also really didn't want to spend any money; the pillows needed to arrive on my doorstep from a secret admirer/mind reader.

AND THEN, during one of my frequent perusals of the local Hospice thrift store, the heavens parted and there was a velvet leopard (cheetah? jaguar?) fabric remnant. I bought it, procrastinated for two weeks, and then boom!, I made my pillow. In a perfect world that $2 fabric remnant would have resulted in a pair of pillows, but such is reality that I had just enough for one lonely little leopard pillow.


Don't you worry, someday I will work up the courage to saw off my arm and leg. Then I will trade my mutilated limbs for a newly reupholstered sofa. That will be the day. Maybe I'll even cut off a toe for another velvet leopard print pillow...

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Friday, April 17, 2015

Trash and Treasures

You never know when motivation will strike. Personally it seems to happen when I've spent too much time doing the mundane. Work, dishes, laundry...

I get all, "Forget this!" and start doing something completely irrelevant and counterproductive to a clean house. I revel in the irony of beautifying something to stand in contrast to the dump that is our home. That's right, mother in laws everywhere, I revel in it. 

Long story short:

A utility cart I swiped off the side of the road...

Even being near the biggest window, the lighting sucked. Forgive me.

Monday, April 13, 2015

Look whose bathroom is fancy and shit...

A pastor once told me shit is not necessarily a bad word in the proper context, and what context is more proper than a description of this bathroom?

Behold:


Throw in primer, three shades of paint, and a few accessories, and 9 times out of 10 you'll get this:






These guys think the camera exists only to take pictures of them. Which is 99% true.